As I reflect, I find myself thinking about moments in time. Many things happen to each person every day. Some of these things are significant and some are not, but what I have realized is that I need to pay attention to these things no matter how big or small.
A few years back when I found it more difficult to talk about our son’s autism, I remember always giving people his “resume” I will call it. They would ask a question and automatically I would go to all of the things that he could do and I would start talking about these accomplishments so that the negative things would be in the background. Now I don’t think this is a bad way of thinking at all because after all, shouldn’t we focus on positive things rather than negative?
Looking back, I was always trying to validate his self-worth by the things that he did as to me, that’s how the world always seemed to look at things, especially for anyone who is different.
I knew that others could not or perhaps would not look at him without his label of “autism” and see an amazing person. Our son is actually one of my favorite people in this world. I adore him so much and he gets me just as I get him. It’s very freeing to be around him. He makes me truly happy every single day.
This weekend I watched him doing various different things. Some were good and some, like any parent, drove me crazy! But what I noticed was the little things, the moments in time, that probably no one else did.
We were at church and sometimes, he reads the prayers and sometimes he sings, but on this particular day, he was doing both and he even had some good dance moves to go with the music! I imagine what it’s like for him sometimes, when there is always someone telling you what to do or always someone asking you three questions in 30 seconds and not giving you any time to answer. But I don’t have to ask him because I know how he feels. I see it in his face.
The small moments are the ones that I enjoy the most with him. We love walking the dog together and shopping together and even singing totally off-key in the car. These are the moments in time that I truly treasure!
Each day now, I make a point of ignoring the irritating or down moments and participating in the joyful moments in time, not just with him but with everyone.
Try it, you may be surprised how much you like it!