So, it has been challenging, to say the least, trying to deal with another autism diagnosis in our home. It’s like, where do you begin? Our daughter is 17 years old so it’s not like we can go back to childhood and have a “do over.” We have to start from where we are today.
Also, her autism is completely different than our son’s so it’s been crazy trying to scramble to help, find information and deal with it, almost like time is running out. But is it? I don’t know really.
As a parent, I try to understand how I missed all the signs. How did we not see? Did we have blinders on?
The part for me that is really hard to accept, is not the diagnosis, but what to do to help. Also, it’s a lot harder because there is a lot of resistance, resentment, contempt. I would like to say that I don’t know why, but I do.
It’s almost, like she’s saying, “You guys forgot about me.” “You guys ignored me and look now what happened.” Also, she does not want interference because of her age. She wants other people to help her figure things out, not her parents and this is hurtful and frustrating.
I feel that she doesn’t trust us anymore. That’s just a feeling because she’s not so great at expressing how she feels about things.
I almost feel like we let her down in a way. We missed all of the signs that we should have seen. Can we even help now?
Can we make a difference in her life? I would like to think that we can, but she is very resistant to our help, so I really don’t know.
All I do know now is that we will try to do whatever we can to make her life easier, to help her, and to be there for her with whatever supports she requires.
We will see what happens. Right now, I am just trying to take it moment by moment to figure out what comes next.